7 Tips for Hot Dogs Starting Out in Stand-Up by Joe Kwaczala

If you're one of the tens of people out there who call themselves "comedy blog fanatics," I'm sure you've thoroughly read these two recent entries, which are both stirring up a lot of conversation. There are salient points being made on each side (some rather controversial), but I can't ignore that one perspective is being completely ignored. So please indulge me, for I have my own list. Me!

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An apology

While I try to keep The Steamroller lighthearted and fun, once in a while something too big to ignore comes along, the sort of thing that will only continue hurting people if it isn't addressed. Today, we're going to do just that, via a statement and video apology from Joe Kwaczala, whose life has been recently darkened by such issues.

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Three questions for The Lincoln Lodge

The cast of The Lincoln Lodge ​heads north to Rogers Park for a special standup showcase at Mayne Stage tomorrow night (Wednesday March 27th). Tickets can be purchased by clicking here, be sure to use the code word LODGE when checking out for $5 off your order. In advance of the show, I sent over three questions to be answered by all nine Lodge members.

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The Late Live Show's Point of Reference by Joe Kwaczala

The Late Live Show's sixth and final season kicks off tomorrow (Saturday, March 23rd) at midnight at iO. I've been a fan of the show for as long as I've been going to comedy shows in Chicago and am sad to see them go (it's no mercy killing, either, the show's wrapping up because Joe Kwaczala, Late Live's host and co-creator is moving to Los Angeles this summer). I hope to catch as many of the eight shows they've got lined up between tomorrow and May 11th, and you should plan to do the same.

Joe's here now to take us behind the scenes to the Late Live Show's writers room, offering a glimpse into the cultural detritus that often sidetracks their writing processes. You can pick up tickets for any/all Late Live Shows here.

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EXCLUSIVE Late Live Show Sketchfest Teaser

Joe Kwaczala here. Since this is our first time doing the show on a Friday when people have work, The Late Live Show does not have the luxury of using the daytime to rehearse. I'm trying to make the best use of our time, so I sent out some direction to the cast via e-mail, along with this sad little diagram I made in MS Paint. So consider it a tantalizing look behind the scenes! Does this teaser get you all teased up and excited? What could it be for?!? Also, if anyone needs me to do any freelance MS Paint work, I am very busy right now, so please find someone else.

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The Late Live Show presents: Razzin' Rudolph

Hello, friends! Joe Kwaczala here, host of The Late Live Show. Did you know that we're having a Christmas special this Saturday? Well, we are, and you should be excited because this installment will have more comedic content than a normal episode. However, there were still some ideas that we liked that didn't make it very far in our writing process for whatever reason. But since you're such a nice person, I'm going to let you take a peek at one of these ideas that could have been...

I think the title of the sketch came before the idea, which is a thing that sometimes happens with us. In a writers' meeting, the phrase "Razzin' Rudolph" was uttered for some reason, and it got the room riffing on the premise, "What if Rudolph was in the front row of a Def Comedy Jam show when an insult comic was on stage?" Below are some jokes/insults that the comic maybe would have said. I think we talked about the comic also being a reindeer. Whatever he was, his jokes were meant to be really really bad, but the audience can't get enough of it. The other part to this was that Rudolph just wanted to have a nice night out with his wife; they're getting older, maybe drifting apart, and this is not helping.

Anyway, here are the jokes. If this is your first exposure to The Late Live Show, please keep in mind that the following is maybe the culmination of two minutes of thought:

  • Lookit this muthafucka's nose. What kinda WACK ass crack he into?! Look like maybe BAMBI's on her period!
  • Yo, if his nose so bright... why his brain so stupid?!
  • Ha ha! With your big red nosed-ass sittin up front like "uhhh, excuse me."
  • This Prancer-lookin' ass got a maraschino cherry for a nose.
  • Hey idiot, how'd your nose even get like that? From giving head to a stop light?
  • I see your children don't have red noses. Probably because your wife fucked some regular ass deer to make them!
  • You like a shape-shiftin' CLOWN with that nose.
  • What's your name? Rudolph? Motherfucker's name is RUDOLPH. Well, it's RUDE OLPH you to show ya broke ass face in public! Ya ugly! Look at him. Motherfucker think he Blitzen or some shit. Goddamn...

So as you might have already guessed, one of the main reasons behind this bit's rejection was "Guys, what are we doing?" But please come to The Late Live Show Christmas Special this Saturday. We actually worked hard on it. Plus, we've got Erik Adams from The A.V. Club and holiday music from The Nothingheads! How can you say no?!

Tickets available here: http://thelateliveshow.com/tickets