CAVES is a brand new improv team formed in March 2014, featuring four talented performers named Jen Burns, Kristina Felske, Jennifer Mills, & Becca Slack. They've secured a run of shows at the Upstairs Gallery on Saturday evenings at 8pm through the end of May, performing alongside a slew of Upstairs Gallery house teams like Dead $$$ and Big Trees!

As a means of getting folks introduced to CAVES, they've put together and answered a questionnaire full of interesting and provocative questions that reveal shocking truths about all four members.

Name, Age, Where you from, giiiiiiirl?

• Jennifer: It Jennifer girl. It came from shore view Minnesota and struck Chicago from New York. 29!
• Becca: Becca, 26, I grew up in Colorado, I hope that’s okay with you :)
• Jen: Jennifer Buttpee Burns, 27, Cincinnati Ohio, I moved here in 2011
• Kristina: Kristina, 25, a woman's heart should be so hidden in God that a man has to seek Him just to find her.

Give me three (3) words to describe yourself.

• Jennifer: 135 pounds, nervous temperament, intense and shake
• Becca: Obedient, Flexible, Open to change :)
• Jen: Big Booty Hoe
• Kristina: I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way (s)he handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.

What personal values and principles are the most important to you?

• Jennifer: Believe it by hard work. $100 think about a lot of money. Think about by my family.
• Becca: I value honesty and constructive criticism. How else will I know that I am doing everything incorrectly and not to your liking? :)
• Jen: Be nice to animals, you never know which ones are really aliens (parrots). When in doubt, SHOUT! Give me 6 hours to chop down a tree and I'm going to spend 4 hours chewing my nails and shit.
• Kristina: Bitterness is like cancer. It eats upon the host. But anger is like fire. It burns it all clean.

Which three (3) famous people do you admire most?

• Jennifer: Cash, Johnny. Caymond of Johnny. The man who be elaborate, and won Nobel Peace prize for microfinancing
• Becca: I really love Joni Mitchell, but if you don’t like her, I’ll stop liking her and like whoever you like. I also want to apologize for liking her in the first place, sometimes I need a little guidance. :)
• Jen: Dr. Peter Venkman, Dr. Raymond Stantz, Dr. Egon Spengler
• Kristina: I think a hero is any person really intent on making this a better place for all people.

Which three (3) famous people do you think are most like you?

• Jennifer: Are based on hair, is: Emma stone, Zoe Deschannel, Oprah (when she have a forlocked hair)
• Becca: The dog that played “Air Bud.” Any animal actor really. Like me, they are well-trainer and will do tricks for treats and pats on the head.
• Jen: Nobody is like me because there’s only one Jennifer Burns :) #hihaterz
• Kristina: Maya Angelou.

Where do you see yourself in five (5) years to 10 years?

• Jennifer: I wish to live in the city which is bigger than a town. I want to own a low allergic cat. And Big things!
• Becca: It all depends on what you are doing. You want to travel the world? I'm there. You just wanna hang out? Great, I love chilling. You want to have a family? You got it! I'll start taking prenatal vitamins now, really prep my womb.
• Jen: In the Caribbean bangin’ on a trash can
• Kristina: My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and some style.

A kid comes up to you and kicks you in the shin, what do you do?

• Jennifer: There is absolutely nothing I can do, I become troubled with a child of another.
• Becca: Is this your kid? If it's your kid, then it was cute and he was just expressing himself physically. I was probably in his way. Is his mom out of the picture? I will help you raise him. :)
• Jen: That depends, was this at a mall? I’d go to Cinnabon.
• Kristina: I love to see a young girl go out and grab the world by the lapels. Life's a bitch. You've got to go out and kick ass.

If you could have three wishes, what would they be?

• Jennifer: I take a trip to the world. I decide to assume the best friendship of one with really huge fame. I do life in a huge factory where it is fine to live.
• Becca: 1. to always know what your thinking 2. to always know what you need 3. better teeth
• Jen: 1. More wishes (lol stop playin!) 2. Time travel 3. To be one with the cosmos and have all the knowledge of the universe.
• Kristina: My great hope is to laugh as much as I cry; to get my work done and try to love somebody and have the courage to accept the love in return.

If you could be a circus performer, which act would you be?

• Jennifer: Trapeze, I the dream about it the show now!
• Becca: Nothing dangerous, I need to be around to take care of you. So maybe, ticket taker. Unless you like dangerous?? Then maybe lion tamer. :)
• Jen: Juggala! OH mummy! Please mummy! Let me be a Juggala at the circus!
• Kristina: To be left alone on the tightrope of youthful unknowing is to experience the excruciating beauty of full freedom and the threat of eternal indecision.

What color best describes your personality and why?

• Jennifer: A marron. Because I am teacher, I am the color of a dusty library, a very earnest person.
• Becca: Rainbow, so I can be any color you want me to be. :)
• Jen: Color me a bad girl because I deserve a spanking #hihaterz :)
• Kristina: We all should know that diversity makes for a rich tapestry, and we must understand that all the threads of the tapestry are equal in value no matter what their color.

If you could live in any period of history, when would it be?

• Jennifer: It is necessary to do my rotation for the 60s.
• Becca: Whenever you were conceived. I would want to thank your parents for making you. I bet their love making was as beautiful as you. :)
• Jen: The Caribbean bangin’ on a trash can
• Kristina: History, despite its wrenching pain, cannot be unlived, but if faced with courage, need not be lived again.

If you were a ghost, where would you haunt?

• Jennifer: I think that a haunted house goes in Wicker Park. I would live with those ones there!
• Becca: I would haunt anybody that has ever hurt you or done you harm. Unless you think that's too mean. Then I would haunt a place not a lot of people go, like a Quizno's, so that I don't scare anyone. :)
• Jen: How bout this, I’d haunt your sexy ass :)
• Kristina: A Woman in harmony with her spirit / is like a river flowing. / She goes where she will without pretense and arrives at her destination / prepared to be herself / and only herself

No, but seriously, what is the worst way to die?

• Jennifer: I think that it sounds like the worst way to a die that an old person writes off to be live.
• Becca: without you. :)
• Jen: Well as long as we’re being serious than I’d say death by
• Kristina: There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.

What is your biggest fucking fear?

• Jennifer: In addition, I am dead.
• Becca: That I answered all these questions wrong :)
• Jen: Butt Stuff
• Kristina: My life has been one great big joke, a dance that's walked a song that's spoke, I laugh so hard I almost choke when I think about myself.