Hello, friends! Joe Kwaczala here, host of The Late Live Show. Did you know that we're having a Christmas special this Saturday? Well, we are, and you should be excited because this installment will have more comedic content than a normal episode. However, there were still some ideas that we liked that didn't make it very far in our writing process for whatever reason. But since you're such a nice person, I'm going to let you take a peek at one of these ideas that could have been...
I think the title of the sketch came before the idea, which is a thing that sometimes happens with us. In a writers' meeting, the phrase "Razzin' Rudolph" was uttered for some reason, and it got the room riffing on the premise, "What if Rudolph was in the front row of a Def Comedy Jam show when an insult comic was on stage?" Below are some jokes/insults that the comic maybe would have said. I think we talked about the comic also being a reindeer. Whatever he was, his jokes were meant to be really really bad, but the audience can't get enough of it. The other part to this was that Rudolph just wanted to have a nice night out with his wife; they're getting older, maybe drifting apart, and this is not helping.
Anyway, here are the jokes. If this is your first exposure to The Late Live Show, please keep in mind that the following is maybe the culmination of two minutes of thought:
- Lookit this muthafucka's nose. What kinda WACK ass crack he into?! Look like maybe BAMBI's on her period!
- Yo, if his nose so bright... why his brain so stupid?!
- Ha ha! With your big red nosed-ass sittin up front like "uhhh, excuse me."
- This Prancer-lookin' ass got a maraschino cherry for a nose.
- Hey idiot, how'd your nose even get like that? From giving head to a stop light?
- I see your children don't have red noses. Probably because your wife fucked some regular ass deer to make them!
- You like a shape-shiftin' CLOWN with that nose.
- What's your name? Rudolph? Motherfucker's name is RUDOLPH. Well, it's RUDE OLPH you to show ya broke ass face in public! Ya ugly! Look at him. Motherfucker think he Blitzen or some shit. Goddamn...
So as you might have already guessed, one of the main reasons behind this bit's rejection was "Guys, what are we doing?" But please come to The Late Live Show Christmas Special this Saturday. We actually worked hard on it. Plus, we've got Erik Adams from The A.V. Club and holiday music from The Nothingheads! How can you say no?!
Tickets available here: http://thelateliveshow.com/tickets