Each week, local comedian/person of wisdom Annie Donley helps guide those in search of direction, using her unique perspective on life and no-nonsense approach. This week, after some time off for the holidays, Annie's back with three public transit themed segments!
This is Teake it or Leave it advise
Yesterday a woman on the bus scowled at me as I took a seat beside her. I wanted to say something or ask if I had offended her but just kept quiet. What would you have done in this situation?
Erhmmmm did the woman a looky like dis?
well maybe on second thought it was not me afterall Because now that I think abouttit that lady I scowled at was a old fat yentle woman with her gypsy scarves and ratty jackets taeking up one and a have seats on teh bus!! ok u really wanna know what I would heave done?
not have babies. fin.
OK OK HEARE ME OUT!!! people on the bus are fill w/rage which comes from murder which is attribooted to high popluation levels. Just LOOK at this shoking facts about sweeden!!!!!!!!
here we have poplation
hjere we have murder
but at the end of the day who am I to judge
I grew up in a house where decency was next to godliness so I consider myself polite. However, that all seems to go away when I get on a bus or train in the city. There are way too many rude people on public transit. Thoughts on how to keep my cool?
Thoughts and I got lotsof em so but do you wantto hear them all????
You ever hear of the little hermit woman named nell Nell was found in a very delsolate cabin in the woody area by herlself with no companion but the trecherous wolfs .
Well Nell sleeps during the day and tursts no bitch but she has her own language which is quite funny to the everyday ear I tell yo u this is it harder to understeand NELL than when u order chinese food!! Nell come to trust this man jerry right?. And she says jerry is her “gah inja” which is retard for guardian angel. Using popcorn as an incentifeJerry is able to lead Nell outside and into the sun like a sad child dog who has lost her pride.wellll u guessed it jerry figures Nell should be shown a little of the worldand they make the decision to bring Nell into town to which they take PUBLIC TRANSI (EN) T.
Now these are the type of folk u will see on the train so word of the wise is STAY BACK ! do you reall want to get into it with a wolf woman led by a man who thinks popcorn are the way to a woman's shart? (OK MAYBE IT IS LOL). And this all bcs UR not having a great time on that transit ride? ? jake you ‘ll find through life that ppl are not going2 dance for u just to makey your day better so you have to stop demanding this thusly so stay polite take a chill bill dude AND realise theat most ppls life journeys are lots harder than ur journey to and from the supermarket
something to think about aneyways
And now I wrote some jokes ON the train ABOUT the train that Jay leno might read in his monologe
-Cta announces that they will begiun 240 million $ rennovation on the red line. when askes to comment CEO Miller respondens 'well it wasn't quite the level of dog shit we wanted We want Great Dane level dog shit.'
-did u hear about this? the man who jumped in front of a train? Yeas apparamtly he received an email from the cta earlier that day seying Congraguations you’re hired!
-so the cta now has stickers showing u were to tap your ventra card on the new card readers since many riders were complained they did not work. IN toher news, a mob of wives broke into cta headquearters stealing 6,000 'TAP HERE" stickers...
and some more jokes i jus thought of on the fly. Now I now you all know VENTRA is dumb but did u know it was THIS DUMB>??
What is the difference between a Vetra card and a carp?
One is a bottom feeding scum sucker and the other is fish.
Did you hear about the Ventra card who won a gold medal at the Olympics?
He like it so much he decided to get it bronzed.
What did the venta card say to the chicao card plus upon meeting?
Hi Welcome to McDonald may I take your order please?
How do uknow when an ventra card has sent you a fax?
well there's a stamp on it.
Ventra cards girlfriend broke up with him and he asks "why the hell are you breaking up with me?
And she goes, I seen your facebook page. uve been f*cking everyone!"
What do you call a female ventra card with 2 brain cells?
How do you get a cventra card off your front porch?
You pay for the pizza.
I f you just email me your name, and advice question I will get back to you as soon as possible. beep. Annie.donley@@gmail.com